“Hi, my question is regarding re-marriage – is divorce and remarriage adultery? I am engaged to a man that has been married once before, and now divorced. During the marriage, both parties did things that could be considered unfaithful to one another. Although neither person knew what the other had done. The marriage did not necessarily end due to the unfaithful acts. My questions are: 1) since my fiance committed an act of unfaithfulness towards his former wife, is he then always considered an adulterer, even if he has repented of his sin? 2) Is he allowed to be remarried and have it be ok in the eyes of God? 3) IF I marry him, will I then be committing sin and be considered an adulterer? Thank you so much.”
But I do feel we need to call a spade a spade – just as Jesus did – in other words God doesn’t want anyone to divorce – ever – no matter what the circumstances – that seems crystal clear and Jesus even goes as far as to say Moses giving a divorce certificate was not Gods way but because of hardened hearts it was the only option – and I think nothing has changed today, people have not become more ‘godly’.
But Jesus having spelled out in black and white terms what divorce amounts to in God’s eyes – always goes on to offer a way forward – sin of adultery within marriage is no worse than our sins against God generally. Question is – having done it what are we going to do about it – are we not going to call it out for what it is going to do it again?
So my summary of this issue (my humble opinion – please read the Bible yourself);
If it has happened and there is no going back – and we are to enter into another marriage.. we definitely can’t go into it the same way as we did before – the way the liberal churches teach it (since 70% their tithing congregation are likely divorced and most would leave) that divorce is an option if things don’t turn out the way we want.
It’s not what we can get out of it – it’s what we can give – how we can become the right person – not finding the right person for us. No one is ‘compatible’ – we are all self-serving – it’s about becoming compatible.
So my opinion would be yes – according to Jesus one is an adulterer – but from the Bible it’s clear God is always willing to wipe the slate clean. And never forget as I mentioned before – we are ALL adulterers in God’s eyes.
This is a harsh teaching from Jesus but I think the whole point of marriage is commitment – and there is no real commitment if we feel there is always an option to bail out.