How Do I Spot a Dating Scammer?

Online dating scams are so prevalent these days that many people are actually scared to use the Internet to find a soulmate. Just look at the uproar surrounding the generally believed to be safe, and the world’s largest dating site ‘Match.com’ for an idea of how ‘good’ things can go bad. To be frank – almost all dating sites and matchmaking services are set up purely for profit and because of this, website owners in the main don’t really care about individuals – you – or your safety. They are interested in their wallet.

The problem of romance scammers is most prevalent on free dating websites since there is no budget to weed out or vet individuals (there is one exception – the free site www.fusion101.com – owned and run by Christians and setup – purely to help Christian singles get married!)

Having said that, if you use a decent pay service – that will straight away eliminate a good proportion of scammers that are abroad – but of course it won’t protect you from people who can afford to pay but still have suspect motives and are looking for hookups and all the rest (if you are Christian and use a genuine Christian singles owned and run website you may be spared of much of this as the people on there in the main will be God fearing folk looking for like-minded people).

Spotting Internet Dating Scammers and Dating Con Artists

Below is a link to very in-depth guide as to how you can use the web to meet new singles and stay safe online.  Make sure you read all the way down to the end as there are some bullet points that will make you pretty scam-proof once you have read them! Of course – you can avoid any financial cons and con-artists by making a rule RIGHT NOW to NEVER send money online to anyone you meet on the web. This may not save you some heartache and time wasted but it will save your bank account being raided by unscrupulous people. God bless you and here is there article; How to stop romace scammers

How Do I Deal With an Abusive Parent?

Question;  How Do I Deal With an Abusive Parent?

“I am a 13 year old Christian boy. My dad has been verbally abusing me with loud shouting and threading me physically to me and my brothers. His anger came from my grandfather abusing him and my dad and my grandfather relationship are not healthy. I was never able to see my grandfather that much as my mom’s father. He would shout at us when my mom isn’t at home. He would try to punish us in a way that it will scare us and hurt us. I think it’s affecting me mentally,socially. He tried to feed us cow stomach for some reason and he got mad because I didn’t like it. I have a lot of stress from him. He blames that I told on my mother that he was angry which I haven’t recently. His shouting is so loud the people can hear him next door. It’s hard for me to respect my dad if he and emotionally verbally abuse me. My ears hurt because he shouts so loud. He says people like me are the worst humans. Now I don’t know what I did wrong to anger him and I am very confused. I think I have anxiety disorder because I feel like harming myself sometimes. He says he’s trying control his anger. He’s lectures me that I have to choose a career even though I want to still have few more years to think about it. I feel confused, scared, hurt and sad. I’m scared of myself if ever abuse my child. Please help what to do. I am going to pray for my dad and myself.”


Answer:  Dealing with Abusive Parents?

Very hard to advise as I don’t really know the situation there. Sounds like your father had a rough time so that anger is hard to deal with for him and you. When the situation you describe happens, you must try to stand back and remind yourself why someone does something and then try to forgive over and over – very hard to forgive but if you don’t you get ill – don’t fight back with the verbal stuff. Show no resistance and you may see a change in him over time – Ive seen this work several times. Obviously physical abuse is different and self defence no problem but avoid physical confrontation at all cost.

Re career – most fathers get upset when their kids don’t work or show little sign of wanting to as young people now are often encouraged to spend their time on the PC more than actually being productive and contributing to society so this sometimes upsets the older generations that literally sometimes had to die for what we have now.
My best advice there is if you haven’t already perhaps to get a part time job if it’s possible – any job – until you know what you want to do longer term. Jesus was a carpenter so no work is beneath anyone – and this may keep you out of each others hair and he will be pleased you are looking after yourself.
Please don’t harm yourself – you are no worse than any other human I promise and made in image of God! Ive been so stressed I know what that felling is like to want to hurt yourself. You gotta keep busy – keep learning new things that will help you later in life – watch some inspirational videos then maybe get off the PC and outside make sure you are with people.


Related articles on dealing with an abusive parent, mother or father

www.drphil.com – article on dealing with abusive parents